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Butterfly Sex Position
We were on the sofa, kissing and talking. Things started to heat up and we began to rip each other’s clothes off.
I laid her back and started kissing my way down her naked body. She moaned softly as I reached her wet pussy and teased her with my mouth.
I whispered, “Let’s try the butterfly position”. She nodded and moaned eagerly, desperate to feel me inside her.
I positioned her on the edge of the sofa and slid inside her, raising her legs so they were resting on my shoulders.
It felt so good that we both became totally lost in the pleasure of the moment….
If you want to add more excitement to your sex life, the butterfly sex position could be a great addition! It’s known for its deep penetration and unique angles.
This article will tell you all about this position including sharing some tips for beginners.
What Is the Butterfly Sex Position?
The butterfly position is a sex position where the receiving partner lies on their back on the edge of a sofa, bed, or other surface. The partner with a penis (or sex toy) stands or kneels between their legs to enter them.
The standing or kneeling partner raises their lover’s hips, often by putting their partner’s legs over their shoulders or letting them rest on their chest.
The positioning of the standing partner’s pelvis above the receiving partner creates a natural angle that allows for very deep penetration.
This position can be used to penetrate a vulva or anus. It’s a great alternative to the classic missionary position.
Sometimes, you’ll hear the butterfly sex position referred to as ‘The Blossoming Position’, because that’s what it’s known as in the Kama Sutra.
This position is particularly beneficial for those with a vagina as the receiver. It’s a very popular position for cisgender, heterosexual couples. However, it can be replicated by couples of any gender or sexuality (think sex toys, strap-ons, or slight adjustments for two partners with penises).
As a disabled woman, I love this position because it’s comfortable for me in the receiving position while also allowing me some control over the angle and depth of penetration. I also enjoy being the giver with a partner with a vulva. It allows me to kneel on a cushion while providing pleasure. I don’t have to support my partner’s weight, so it’s accessible for me.
Why Is the Butterfly Sex Position So Popular?
From the description above, it’s probably pretty obvious why the butterfly sex position is such a hit! Let’s cover some of the benefits of this position:
Deep penetration: One of the main reasons people like this position is because it allows for such deep penetration. I love that it allows for this in a way that offers the person being penetrated some control and plenty of comfort.
G-spot stimulation: The angle of this position is excellent for stimulating the G-spot or even the A-spot depending on how deep you get.
Inclusive and accessible: Couples of any gender and with any body parts can use this position, along with the help of some toys and adjustments where needed. This makes it incredibly inclusive. As I mentioned earlier, it can also be very accessible for people with mobility issues like me. If either partner has a large stomach (or even if you both do), this position is fantastic because it allows you to comfortably achieve deep penetration!
Allows for easy clitoral stimulation: One of the other things I love about this position is how easy it is for the standing partner to give clitoral stimulation to their partner (if they’re having sex with a person with a vulva). Alternatively, the receiving partner can stimulate their own clit while being penetrated, which leads to even more intense orgasms.
A good view: Yes, you did read that right. This position is also well-loved because it allows you to get a good view of your partner’s body during sex. I particularly like that it lets you see the pleasure on their face.
Easy transitions between positions: If you like to mix things up during sex, the butterfly position allows you to easily switch to different positions.
How to Perform the Butterfly Sex Position
Start with the receiving partner lying on their back at the edge of the bed, sofa, or even table (we don’t judge here – don’t be afraid to shake things up).
The partner lying down can lift their legs in a V-shape. The penetrating partner can stand or kneel to find the most comfortable angle. This position aids in balance and supports deep penetration.
You can decide whether you want vaginal or anal sex – both work well in this position.
You might want to adjust your positioning and posture to find the right angle for you both. It’s all about what feels good.
The receiving partner can also choose to spread their legs and bend their knees slightly for added comfort and variety.
What Does the Man Do in the Butterfly Position?
We’ll use the term ‘standing partner’ here, as they can be any gender.
The standing partner supports their partner’s legs on their chest or shoulders. They can help to lift their partner’s hips to find the right angle.
The person standing has the most control and does most of the work in this position.
What Does the Woman Do in the Butterfly Position?
The receiving partner lies down on the edge of the bed (or any other surface). They raise their legs to rest them on their partner.
They can help to control the angle of their hips if they’re able, or they can simply lie back and enjoy the experience!
Variations of the Butterfly Sex Position
There are a few different variations of this position. I’ve included some popular variations below.
You can play around to figure out what’s best for you and your partner. You don’t have to follow strict ‘rules’ – you can have fun adapting positions in your own way.
The Standing/Kneeling Butterfly
This is the classic variation we’ve already discussed. In the standing butterfly variation, one partner stands while the other lies down. The other partner raises their legs.
In the kneeling variation, one partner lies down, and the penetrating partner kneels.
The Praying Mantis
I know this doesn’t sound like the most appealing position given the name, but in my experience, it can create new angles and wonderful sensations!
With this variation, the receiving partner bends one leg outward while the standing partner applies pressure on the bent leg.
If you struggle with mobility or have chronic pain, be particularly cautious about the amount of pressure applied on the bent leg.
The Sandwich
This is very similar to the praying mantis position, but instead of only bending one leg, the partner lying down bends both legs outward. The ‘giver’ pushes down on both legs.
The Seashell
Any couple can try the seashell position, regardless of gender or sexual orientation. It’s great for penetration by penis owners or by those using sex toys. I love this position when I’m the person on top using a strap-on! Plus, it can be used for either vaginal or anal sex. Make sure to sneak peek to our anal sex positions guide filled with recommendations from sexperts to enhance your pleasure.
The Criss Cross
Just like it sounds, this sex position involves ‘crisscrossing’ your legs.
The person lying down puts their left leg on their partner’s right shoulder, and their right leg on their partner’s left shoulder. It creates a tighter fit and can feel fantastic.
I also really love putting both of my legs onto one shoulder, which can have a similar effect.
The Scissors
Surprisingly, the Scissors sex position is not just a lesbian sex position as you might have thought—it can be enjoyed by partners of any gender!
If you don’t know the position, it can sound a bit complicated at first but I promise it’s easier than it seems! The scissors position involves two partners facing each other, with their legs intertwined so their genitals touch. They can then rub their genitals together for sexual pleasure.
It’s called scissoring because the position looks like two pairs of scissors open with the middle of the blades touching.
Tips To Enhance Your Experience in the Butterfly Sex Position
I’ve included some top tips below to make the butterfly sex position work best for you:
Communicate with your partner: Communication is one of the most important things with any sex position, especially when trying something new. Chat about your boundaries and expectations. And don’t be afraid to communicate during sex if you want to change something (no – you won’t ‘kill the mood‘, you deserve to enjoy sex). Remember that consent is always key.
Experiment: Try different variations of the position. The receiving partner can try adjusting their legs to figure out what feels best and gives the most pleasure. For example, spreading your legs wider can significantly change the sensation. You can also try adjusting the pace and depth of the penetration.
Use pillows for support: Pillows can be a game-changer when it comes to comfort and alignment in the butterfly sex position. You can put pillows under your hips if you’re the receiving partner. I find this allows for better angles without having to support your own hips, which is great if you struggle with strength or mobility! If the penetrating partner is kneeling, you might want to add a pillow under their knees for extra comfort.
Introduce toys and lubricants: Adding sex toys is always fun and can enhance pleasure. You might also find that lubricants can allow for smoother penetration. There are plenty of lubes that also add a different layer to the sensations you feel during sex.
Take breaks or change positions when needed: Although this sex position is very comfortable for the receiving partner, the person standing or kneeling could get tired or experience muscle strain. Don’t be afraid to take breaks or switch positions. Sex is supposed to feel good!
Use protection: Always use protection like condoms where needed, especially if you’re not in a monogamous relationship.
Have fun: Any sex position is about having fun. Try not to get caught up in whether you’re ‘doing it right’ or how it looks – if it feels good, that’s all that matters!
Final Thoughts: Experiment to See What Feels Good!
The butterfly sex position offers a fun and deeply satisfying way to enhance intimacy and pleasure with your partner.
Whether you’re trying the butterfly position for the first time or looking to refine your technique, I hope this has helped provide some useful tips.
Remember that whatever sex positions you attempt, sex is about having fun and connecting with your lover. So don’t overthink it – let yourself get lost in the moment and have a great time!
